Here is the first chapter of my new book, Better Than Sex
Read, Enjoy, and Comment at the end!
Drinks are by the Pool
Welcome to my new book. Come on in, let me take your coat. There’s a lot of great stuff going on here, so we can have a wonderful time together. There is dancing in the living room, snacks are in the kitchen, there is a movie showing in the basement, and drinks are by the pool. You can nibble on some radical new ideas here, you can test drive tools to use with yourself and others, and you can, hopefully, have a few good laughs along the way. If you like a good treasure hunt, we’ve got that too. I have left little web thingies (please excuse my techie geek talk here) throughout the book with links to video, audio and other goodies on my website.
I’m glad that you came just as you are. No need to dress up. This is a very informal book. You might have already come to some of the other books I invited you to. Many of them had footnotes, interviews going on with dozens of famous people, references, quotations, and a bibliography that stretched all the way from the coat closet to the bathroom down the hall. Those were black tie events, with a catering service, valet parking, and a string quartet in the drawing room. But not with this little Saturday afternoon barbecue book you’ve wandered into here — this is Arjuna Ardagh chez moi, in his flip flops, and shorts, and wrinkled Hawaii shirt — just friends hanging out together. So come on in, make yourself at home, you’ll fit right in. You can meet all the other people who showed up for the party here: http://facebook.com/btsbook
I invited you to this little book because I want to share something marvelous with you. I want to tell you about the One Thing that I am most inspired by, grateful for, and passionate about. It is the thing I most like talking about, and relaxing into. The One Thing is what I have dedicated my whole life to. I want to share with you here how easy it is for you to get yourself some of the One Thing today, in fact how easy it is for anyone on the whole entire planet to enjoy the One Thing, here, now, just as we already are. And if that wasn’t enough already, I want to tell you how you can, very easily, become a vehicle for the One Thing, a distributor, a disseminator, a flag-bearer, an active agent of splendiferous splendor on the earth.
Now tell me, honestly, how cool is that?
Which brings me to the title. I am sure when you got the invitation to this book it must have got you curious. Some people have showed up here who didn’t notice the “than” in the title.
“You Arjuna?” they ask me. I admit that I am. “Good, we got the invitation, and we are here to find out about…” they look around furtively, and mumble out of the side of their pursed lips “…better sex.”
“Excuse me?” I ask them. “You want to find out about what?”
“Sex. We came here to find out about better sex.” Finally, a deep breath of courage. “We want BETTER SEX,” they blurt, “and we want it now.”
“Ah, I see. Well, no need to shout. It’s an innocent mistake. No, actually the invitation said ‘Better THAN Sex.’ I can tell you all about the One Thing that is Better Than Sex.” I beam at them. “The One Thing that is available to anyone, anywhere on the planet, right here, right now, that solves all your troubles instantly, and that gives you access to infinite creativity. AND, I can tell you about how easily you can pass the One Thing onto other people. C’mon in, and I’ll tell you everything. Drinks are by the pool.”
Despite the misunderstanding, some people take me up on the offer. Some remain quite adamant that what they really want is indeed Better Sex, and nothing more or less than that will do. I send them over to John Gray’s house. He has all the best supplements for Mars and for Venus to get His and Her hormones dancing a wild tango on the grand piano. Lucky for all, it totally works (marsvenus.com), and so everyone is happy.
Now you might assume that someone who has the brazen boldness, or the flagrant foolishness to call his book “Better than Sex” is probably just very repressed and stuck up, and does not like sex very much. Since I am British by birth, it would indeed be a reasonable assumption. But that ain’t me babe. No, no, no. I love sex. Sex, sex, SEX. Yes please, over here, more please for me. I have felt very positively about sex, despite my British genes, for more than 42 years, and I plan to stay very enthusiastic indeed about sex for many more years to come. The One Thing that I want to tell you about here is so delicious, so powerful, so sweet, so incredibly fulfilling, so complete, so effective at soothing all your pain, breathing love and humor into your relationships, and lighting up your innate genius, that it is really hard to find words to express just how totally fantastic the One Thing is. So just think of whatever you thought was the very peak of awesomeness, so far (in my case, that would be sex), multiply it by 1000, and there you have it: the One Thing that we are talking about here.
Let me tell you a little more about this One Thing, and how absurd it is that something more available to us than water, or air, or dirt, or cute kittens on Facebook, is not more popular than it actually is. So far.
For starters, The One Thing never, ever, ever, gets boring. I first discovered it about 21 years ago, and I have myself a good fix every day ever since. And every time it’s totally new, never gets repetitive, like it is your very first time, every time. See what I mean? It is Better than Sex.
The One Thing never needs upgrading, replacing or fixing. Once you know where to find it, it stays as shiny and new as the day you first got it out of the box. It has no bugs, no incompatibilities with other programs and no virus can corrupt it. Which, in fact, makes it not only better than sex, but better than the Macintosh Operating System as well, which is another of my favorite things.
If you are single, the One Thing comes in very handy indeed. Have you ever been to a party feeling really, really single? Like you need somebody, want somebody, yearn for somebody to make you whole again? As you may have noticed, that can be an unwise dating strategy. The more you long for Mr or Ms Right, the more needy you become, and the more even semi-right people act indifferent. The One Thing totally takes care of that. Just a few drops of the One Thing under your tongue, and you become beautiful from the inside out, you become irresistibly magnetic, and gorgeous people show up in your life, wanting you, out of thin air. It worked for me, I’m married to the queen of gorgeousness now, and I used to have trouble dating skunks. Which, incidentally, makes the One Thing not only better than sex, but better than Coco Chanel #5 as well.
If you are in a relationship, the One Thing also has magic to offer you. Do you ever get together with your partner for a nice relaxed intimate evening, and find yourselves fighting over random nonsense? Then the more you try to set it right, the deeper you dig the hole, or rather the very very separate two holes you now find yourselves in? The One Thing will magically dissolve the feeling of separation between the two of you, so you just can’t, for the life of you both, remember what the fight was about. The One Thing leaves you just separate enough to find each other interesting, exotic and mysterious, and just merged enough to feel intimate, safe and home. Which makes the One Thing better than Dr Phil.
If you have health problems, you may have heard that doctors tell us that more than 85% of the things which ail us are stress related. Well, the One Thing is the ultimate stress buster.
If you are creative, the One Thing unblocks the flow of the muse, so you become a relaxed scribe for a torrent of brilliance that just pours through you, and all you need to do is lounge by the pool sipping mai tais and download it all.
I could go on and on. In fact I think I will, for another hundred pages or so, because the One Thing has endless great things to be said about it.
I must admit that I am not the first person to write a book about the One Thing, although I might be the first person to do so while lounging by a pool sipping mai tais. Just about every great, creative and truly happy person throughout all of history has relied heavily upon the One Thing for an endless supply of free energy.
By now you are probably wondering where you can get some of the One Thing right away, and start to enjoy it for yourself. OK. So now I’m going to tell you where to go, and where to look. And the best way to do this is to remember one of those ancient texts about the One Thing: an ancient legend from far away and long ago.
Long ago, when the earth and all living creatures were being created, a meeting was called of the council of the Gods. They wanted to make the One Thing available to all Human beings, but they were concerned that it might be misused. So they decided to hide it, where only those people who could value its power could find it.
Where to hide the One Thing was the question. “Let’s bury it deep in the earth,” said one God. But another answered, “No, that will not do, because humans will eventually create huge machines to dig into the earth and find it.”
Another God said, “Let’s sink it in the deepest ocean.” But then came the objection, “No, not there, for they will learn to dive into the ocean in big metal fishes, and will find it.” Then someone said, “Let’s take it to the top of the highest mountain and hide it there.” But once again another replied, “No, that will not do either, because they will eventually climb every mountain and put the One Thing to improper use.” Then they all gave up in despondency. “We do not know where to hide it, because it seems that there is no place on earth or in the sea that human beings will not eventually reach.”
The King of all the Gods thought for a long time and then said, “Here is what we will do. We will hide the One Thing deep in the center of their own being, for humans will never think to look for it there.”
They all agreed that this was the perfect hiding place, and the deed was done. Since that time, humans have been going up and down the earth, digging, diving, climbing, and exploring, searching for power and riches and resources, when all the time the greatest treasure is already within themselves.
This book is all about how to uncover the One Thing that is hidden deep within all of us. And, more important, it is about how to perform the ultimate act of service and loving kindness that anyone could possibly perform for any other human being, which is how to bring the One Thing alive in another person.
In this book, I am going to tell you about how to do this in general terms. I am going to describe for you the seven qualities that anyone can develop to become an excellent support to anyone else in this way. But I am also going to make frequent reference to a particular method which we have developed, called Awakening Coaching, which makes these seven qualities activated and available in anyone who wants to use them. This is a little bit like Steve Jobs writing a book about what it takes to create a really great computer, or Ida Rolf writing a book about how to align the body in gravity. They could each write about basic principles, but of course they would end up referencing Apple Computer or Rolfing a good deal as well. I will tell you all that you need to know here about how to bring forth The One Thing in anyone else, and I will also tell you about how we do it using the tools of Awakening Coaching.
Our exploration must start with you. Remember that this party is a pot luck, right? I see that you are clutching something very delicious in that container you are holding. This is the most important ingredient of all. Lets start right there, with what you brought to the party.
That’s it! First Chapter. I am itchy to hear your thoughts.
I am happy to share more of the book with a group of friends like you.
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