Translucent Aging

This is an excerpt from my book The Translucent Revolution.  We see the fruits of a translucent life nowhere more vividly than when people grow old. Here, the contrast between a life lived in servitude to the Iago trance, and one that has been transformed through awakening, becomes stark. Just as Iago habits catch up […]

Deep Listening

This is an excerpt from Conscious Men, written by John Gray and Arjuna Ardagh. There are many dimensions to listening. One is just like the sky: to be still and receive. Simply listening to someone sharing challenges and issues may in itself be the solution that is required. Particularly for a woman, when she feels […]

No One Else Like You

This is an excerpt from my book Better than Sex. Take a moment and have a look at your right thumb. Now turn it over, so you can see the underneath. You can see lots of squiggly lines there. There are seven billion people on this planet, and none of them have the same thumb print […]

The Prostitution of the Word

I grew up among writers. My father was a journalist for the London Times, who later went on to write seventeen books. My mother was an editor at Faber and Faber. T.S. Eliot sat in the next office to my Mum. Back in the 1960s, publishing was known as “the gentleman’s profession.” Deals were made […]

The Wisdom of Inadequacy

“I screwed up…” “I’m a failure…” “I’m not good enough…” “It’s my fault…” Everyone has thoughts like this from time to time. Everyone sometimes experiences the emotions of shame, inadequacy, guilt, and remorse. The pop psychology/New Age/spirituality world has given these thoughts and feelings an unequivocally bad wrap. They are thought of as toxic, limited: […]

Eat the Wild Strawberry

I just got back from a wonderful visit to the island of Corfu in Greece. A group of us met for a Radical Brilliance one-week intensive, which was spectacular. Prior to leaving for Greece, I had spent almost two months recovering from a serious car accident, so I had been forced to lie low and […]

Meeting the Beloved

I love you. I need you. I want you. I cannot live without you. All of us at some point in our lives have said or thought words like these. At the time they seem very real, as though this new person is the magical missing ingredient to make us whole. In fact, how did […]

Become the Other

This is an excerpt from my book Leap Before You Look.    When you find yourself courting conflict with another person, Go somewhere alone where you can be undisturbed. Put two cushions down on the bed or on the floor. Sit on one of them and close your eyes. Imagine the other person is sitting before […]

Why We Sabotage What We Most Long For

As a coach and a trainer of coaches, I am very lucky to work with extraordinarily talented, resourceful, brilliant people. I have helped people write movie scripts, write books, develop courses, bring new products to the market, found companies, and much more. Whenever I interview a new client for coaching (which usually lasts for about […]

Communication in the Bedroom

This is an excerpt from Conscious Men, by John Gray and Arjuna Ardagh.   We have learned that the most important gift a woman can give to a man is to communicate her needs: to find ways to tell him honestly when she wants to have sex, when she wants to be sensuous and cuddle, […]

Dropping the Blame Game

A few days ago, I was driving from an appointment in Olympia, Washington, to the airport in Seattle to fly home. It was around 5 o’clock in the evening, but the traffic was surprisingly moving forward fluidly. Just after I passed the Nisqually National Wildlife Refuge, I was on an open stretch of freeway. The […]

Awakening and Enlightenment

This is an excerpt from my book, Better than Sex.  Many people may wonder: Does this process of Awakening Coaching lead to Enlightenment? Before we can answer this question, we have to have some reference for what this word “Enlightenment” means. It has been used quite freely in English in the last forty years or […]

Why Awakening

Most people who seek out the services of a coach do so because they want to overcome obstacles in their life, or because they want to realize some outcome. People come to a coach to complete a book, to found a company, to overcome procrastination, or to become a more present and caring parent or […]

Be Present with Your Feelings

This is an excerpt from Conscious Men, written by John Gray and Arjuna Ardagh.    All men have feelings, ranging from shame and humiliation, to anger and outrage, to tenderness and compassion. The primary difference between different men is not what we each feel, but our capacity to be with it and express it in a […]