Why Do We Avoid our Greatness?

BetterThanSex_shdw215x320I’ve written eight books so far, and I just came out with the latest one, Better Than Sex. The books that I’ve written previously were a little more erudite, many had footnotes, a long bibliography, and careful references.

About a year ago I realized “Hey, I’m in my 50’s, sooner or later I’ve just got to say it straight up, as it is, as far as I’m concerned.” The naked Arjuna Ardagh, if that is not too unappetizing an image. I wrote this latest book in a very simple way: pretty much just the same as if I spoke to a friend about what is absolutely most important to me. You know those games we’ve all played at parties sometimes? “If you had just 5 minutes left, what you would do, what would you say, who would you call…?” The book I’ve just written is the condensation of what I would most like to leave behind in the world.

Now here is the interesting thing that I’ve noticed, since this book got published: I’m way more edgy about it. If people like it, it has way more significance for me than anything I’ve written before. I want to kiss them, invite them home, be lifelong friends. If someone doesn’t like it, or even doesn’t like bits of it, it also feels a little personal… just as if I’d taken all my clothes off, and then somebody pointed and laughed out loud at the size of my … pectoral muscles.

HigherPurpose sunflowerI’ve realized that giving the gift you were really born to to give is a huge risk. Whether it’s writing a book (like it was for me), or a piece of music, or a song, or even your signature recipe, or putting on your finest clothing, and making yourself look really beautiful, you are putting yourself on the line. It’s more dangerous, more alive, more rewarding, but also more terrifying, than staying in the safety of business as usual.

As a coach, I’ve often worked with people to help them bring forth this deepest gift, the unique gift that I am convinced everybody has waiting inside of them. Over the years I’ve come to accept the fact that we have just as much resistance, if not more, to stepping into our greatness as we have enthusiasm. stop.thbSometimes it is confusing isn’t it? Why do people get jobs they don’t really like, and stay in them for decades collecting a regular pay check, all the time knowing full well that they have left their true passion to grow moldy, in the very back of the refrigerator.

What is your deepest passion? What is the gift that you intuit you were born to bring to the world? The one that will not only light up your own heart like a Christmas tree, but also drive everyone around you to fits of exuberance as well? When you start to feel a twinge of terror, as well as excitement, you have probably hit the nerve.

You may not be ready for a public performance, or an official launch today, but coming out of the closet right now and writing in the comments box below your intuition of your deepest gift may be a great step, perhaps an irreversible one. I’m looking forward to reading what you have to say.

Tags: , , ,

5 Responses to “Why Do We Avoid our Greatness?”

  1. Freja May 27, 2014 at 4:09 pm // Reply

    This post comes to me in a time where I am thinking of just that! The vulnerability of actually doing being living what I love. I want to teach conscious dance!


  2. Claudia May 27, 2014 at 4:12 pm // Reply

    Dear Arjuna, thank you so much for your nakedness. It can´t be anything but beautiful. Nothing touches us more deeply than simplicity and honesty and a pure nakedness. If you ask me what would be my deepest gift I would answer you: ingeniousness, kindness, a vulnerable and open heart, joy, sadness, surrender, respect, commitment, creativity, love , humility, my special way to communicate and to connect people…oh I see: there are a lot of gifts. If you ask me about my longing, this would be to connect people in the spirit of the common awakening. Organizing groups, events, festivals, creative gatherings in all forms. Thank you for hearing me,dear one <3 Blessings, Claudia


    • Zandra May 29, 2014 at 5:13 pm // Reply

      In reply to Claudia.
      that’s what i was about write.


  3. Carla May 28, 2014 at 2:20 am // Reply

    What happens when I can’t find that light. Nothing sparks and I feel so lost? I have tried several things in the past few years and feel no light and no passion when in the beginning I did. Help!!!


  4. Maria May 30, 2014 at 7:29 am // Reply

    I have so many talents and skills that if I took the time to nurture one of them, I could be an expert. However, my life hasn’t been so giving of that time to focus on just one thing and all my entry level skills have been necessary for my main job of parenting.
    Now that my children are older and loving the many aspects of my past life, I am now at a great lose of which skill would be the one I should focus on. Having all of them makes me, me.


Leave a Reply to Zandra Click here to cancel reply.

Please type the characters of this captcha image in the input box

Please type the characters of this captcha image in the input box